Necessary Evil

Conversation of a fall evening -

-Okay, son, when you are showered & cleaned up you can do me a fashion show.
-What?
-I bought you some new clothes today;  I need you to try them on before I take off all the tags.
-Why?
-To be sure they fit, duh!
-No, why did you buy me new clothes?  I have enough clothes.
-Well, you know we are going on a school visit.  It's going to be cold up there in the States now.  You needed some pants & long sleeve shirts.
-Okay.

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-Oh!  Those look nice.  My guessing on the shirt size was right on.
-I think it's kind of tight.
-Can you move your arms all around?
-Yeah.
-Are the seams at your shoulders?
-Yeah.
-Do the sleeves cover your wrists?
-Yeah.
-Okay, then.  Not too tight; not too small.  Fits just right!  Fix the collar, there.  Do you like the color of that shirt?  I think it actually looks pretty good with those khaki's, don't you?
-It's okay.
-What do you mean 'it's okay'?  Don't you like it?
-Well, it's green.
-And?
-And it has stripes.
-Yes, I did notice that when I bought it.  What's the problem?
-I don't know.  It's just that, well, it's not really ME.
-What do you mean?
-Stripes...
-Would you prefer solids?
Blank stare.
-If you don't like stripes would you prefer solids - you know, just one plain color?  You do know that solids are the opposite of stripes, in the clothing world - kind of like on the pool table...You really don't like it?
-It just seems a little formal.
-Formal?  How can a long-sleeved polo feel 'formal'?
-I don't know, it just does.
-Well, you can untuck the shirt, I guess.  How does that feel?
-Better...
-But?
Scuffling of feet; plucking at sleeves...
-I don't KNOW.
-What would make this outfit feel more like YOU?
-Why can't I wear the clothes I already have?  Like the T-shirts I like.
-You mean those T-shirts that are 3 sizes too big?
-So?
-Look.  You are going on a school visit.  It's a 'visit', but it's also secretly an 'interview'.  You've got to look like you know how to dress appropriately.
-But my T-shirts have great designs - like stuff about sailing & cool stuff like that.
-I agree that your T-shirts have great designs.  & if they actually FIT, we probably could have gone with one or two of them - but they are too big.  Schools want to see 'mature young man with a lot to offer' not 'gangster in training for a prison rap band'.  Go put on the other shirt.
-I don't even LIKE rap!
-There you go.  So why should you look like that? 

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-Anyway, I DID actually look at some graphic T-shirts, but they had V-necks...
-Oh, that's no good.
We sit silently in our separate rooms, wondering what exactly is wrong with a V-neck T-shirt.  Whatever it is, tho, apparently we DO agree on something.
-Are you coming out?
-Yeah.
-Oh, that's a nice color blue.  Looks good with your eyes!
-Which color blue?  They are stripes again.
-OMG!  Not stripes AGAIN!  Will you be all right?  Do you need to sit down & take some deep breaths?
-Mom!
-Anyhow, it's not the same kind of stripe.  The green shirt was predominantly green with a few different sized white stripes.  This shirt is dark & light blue big stripes of equal size.
-Whatever.
-You really don't like these shirts?
-They're okay.
-What's the problem?  You can't go thru life wearing giant T-shirts & shorts for all occasions.  There are some times that you NEED more formal, or let's say, 'casually formal' (or would that be 'formally casual'?) clothes to wear.  But that doesn't mean you have to not like them.
-Okay, fine.  If this is what people wear in the States, then okay, I will wear them.  But don't expect me to get all excited about them.
-Son, we are talking about a polo shirt & khaki's; these are a necessary evil of modern day life - it's not like I am dressing you in a tuxedo or something.  There is probably not a boy in the civilized world who does not have to wear this type of outfit now & then. You should still be able to LIKE your clothes, even if you wouldn't wear them every day.  You want to look like you fit in.  After you prove that you can fit in, then you can look like yourself.
-That's weird.
-True.  But, that's the way it is.  Think about your school uniform.  That's something you wear everyday that is not 'you'.
-Right!  And that's fine.  But, do you think I like my school uniform?  It's not like I get all excited when you buy me another uniform.
-Ah, but if I bought the wrong uniform, then you might take some notice.
????

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-There is something to be said for the peace of mind that comes with knowing you are dressed correctly for whatever event you are going to.  Still, there's no reason you can't be excited about those types of clothes that you don't normally wear.
-You're such a girl.
-Yeah, well...okay, how about this:  your swim suits.
-What about them?
-Well, I don't hear you going on & on, like, "Well, if this is what people have to wear to go swimming, okay, but I'd just rather wear my T-shirt & shorts in the water."
Laughing.
-Stop it, Mom!  I don't sound like that!  Besides, that would be stupid!
-Exactly!  And you do seem to enjoy picking out different swim suits.  Why do you care about them, when after all, you 'wouldn't really wear them every day'?  Why get excited about what kind of swim suit you wear?
-Because the swim suits fit my personality.
-Right.  So, within the confines of polo's & khaki's, I have tried to 'fit your personality'.  I have picked colors that look good on you.  I have stayed away from things I didn't figure you would like, for example:  pink, or designs that are too busy, or FLOWERS, for heaven's sake.  I think you should be a little more appreciative of the fact that you can actually trust your mother to pick out decent clothes.  I would have rather died than let MY mother ever pick out MY clothes when I was your age - she was never particularly good about that sort of thing...
Chuckles.
-Besides, look at the bright side - you didn't even have to go shopping!  That should generate some excitement right there.
-True.  You have a point there...

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-So, we're good?  You're happy now?  You like these clothes, then?
-I guess...
-What now?!
-Well, why'd you by so many?
-MANY!  I bought TWO shirts!  What makes you think ...

But, let us slip away quietly now...