Yesterday my husband was in the mood to be entertained, so he went to the store & picked up The Driver's Guide (45th Anniversary Edition!) for this Jamaica.
We actually (thankfully) already received our driver's licenses in this country (which is an entertaining story in it's own right), so we were not in need of the Driver's Guide. My husband thinks it will make a great souvenir when it comes time to leave this island.
My older son, who in the States would probably have received his Learner's Permit by now, was interested in checking it out. He began reading us some passages as we rode home.
"Get this!" he said, "It says here in the Preface that '...it is essential for the potential motorist to learn as much as possible beforehand about driving...'"
"Sounds like a good plan, that people should learn how to drive before receiving their licenses! I wonder who thought that up?" I said, as my husband braked suddenly to avoid being sideswiped by a taxi.
"And...", my son went on, "'...all road users to be aware of safe practices on our roadways...' So these cars are all practicing! Maybe that explains something..."
My other son looked out the window, "I think they need to practice a lot more. They don't seem to be very good yet." My husband stopped at the red light, while the taxi beside him decided to squeeze diagonally between us & another car to claim the spot in front of us at the light. At the same time, another taxi idling past us on the shoulder had to stop when the first taxi beat him to the punch.
"Here! 'Road Safety Tips - Always look out for pedestrians as they are more vulnerable...'"
"Well, I have seen them do that!" I exclaimed, "Look out your window; here is an example of that rule right now!" The taxi in front of us, upon receiving the green light (& several honks), lept forth from its position & spied a pedestrian crossing the road against the light up ahead. The taxi driver gunned his engine, squealed his tires & angled quickly into the lane the pedestrian had gained, in an effort to scare the poor guy up onto the median. As the man jumped for his life, the taxi driver shook his fist out his window & swerved back into our lane, yelling back at the guy.
"You'll like this one!" my son said to my husband, "'EMERGENCY VEHICLES - If you see or hear emergency vehicles with their sirens on & lights flashing, drive as close to the curb as possible & stop & remain stationary until the emergency vehicle has passed.'"
"Right!" chortled my husband, "Where's the part in the manual about racing the ambulance?"
"And the part about never stopping for the ambulance?" added my younger son (& he doesn't even drive!).
"What about the notation that most ambulances don't seem to have an engine powerful enough to even reach the speed limit - no wonder people don't stop for them - most people drive faster than that!" I said. "Or the fact that most ambulances & firetrucks drive around with their lights on ALL THE TIME! I have seen them getting GAS with their lights on. I don't think they know HOW to turn them off!"
"And this one!" my son laughed in disbelief at the manual, "'...Driver's should not follow closer than 150 metres (500 feet) behind any emergency vehicle...' Who'd drive BEHIND an ambulance? No one wants to go THAT slow!"
"And, in the unlikely event the ambulance IS going faster than traffic," I laughed, "he usually has a string of cars running along RIGHT behind him, like tin cans tied to a Just Married car - I don't think that counts as 500 feet!
"Look out, Papa - there's the red - it says here that '...you must obey all traffic light signals...'"
"Well, the manual must list me by name then," my husband shook his head, as we counted five cars running the red in the next lane, "Because I'm the only one obeying them!"
Don't worry, there is lot's more! We are only on page 8! But, let's not rush it all into one blog entry - there is PLENTY of material to save for another time...
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